Meet the modern day Ninja

I read about this a few days ago but I never knew what it would look like in motion. Now, I know. Further proof that the Japanese are crazy:

Imagine the embarrassment for everyone involved if someone thought that this disguise was so convincing that they wanted to but a real bottle of soda:

"Wait, why won't this machine take my money? Why aren't the buttons doing anything? Is it even plugged in? Do soda machines usually have feet?"

"My apologies, sir. I was merely hiding from a potential rapist, thief or murderer. This disguise is just a folded skirt."

"You know, I thought it felt like a skirt! Good luck with on your hiding adventures. One question- what are you doing in a forrest?"

Waterboarding isn't as fun as it sounds

Here's Keith Olbermann presenting a special report on the latest hot topic in American politics, waterboarding and showing off his very, very, very, very... big vocalbulary:



Here's everything but a good answer- Mike Mukasey at a Confirmation Hearing:



Here's Harry Shearer showing us the most positive side of waterboarding in the style of a Beach Boys tune. It's up for an award too:

Overkill: Prince style

Prince has continued to piss everyone off after trying to "reclaim the internet" from YouTube, eBay and the Pirate Bay and threatened legal action to prevent them further encouraging copyright violations. Now, he's taking legal action against sites (including many of his own fan sites) for hosting photos of him, album covers, even lyrics. Madness.

These tales of a Prince gone mad reminded me of the Dave Chappelle skit featuring Eddie's brother Charlie recounting his basketball game against Prince:

Overkill: 40 minutes of Family Guy style

Press release: "Fox Home Entertainment has announced Family Guy Presents: "Blue Harvest" which parodies the movie that started it all – Episode IV A New Hope. The season six premiere will be available to own in either a standard ($22.98) or a special edition ($34.99). The standard edition will include more than four minutes of exclusive DVD material, animatics/commentaries, interviews with Seth MacFarlane and George Lucas, an Uncensored Track, and a teaser of the next Star Wars spoof, "Something, Something, Something Dark Side". The special edition will include a 3-D fight scene (with glasses!), a t-shirt, trading cards, an exclusive brochure, and collectible packaging."

Wow. It even includes the actual DVD there somewhere. That's 40 minutes worth of Family Guy in all it's filler-joke glory. It also comes with four whole minutes of extra scenes.

One of my favourite TV shows, Robot Chicken, had a much better Star Wars special than Family Guy. Watch a clip here:

Everything You Wanted To Know About The Vajingo * But Were Afraid To Ask...

With the help of a cuddly toy, Tyra Banks are her friends show us... interesting stuff. She's speaking to women as if they don't even know it's there, which scares me.



The educational prop reminded me of a cool toy service Rick found. Every kid will want one come Christmas time (which is now, for some wicked reason). Here's a promo picture for Giant Microbes:

You can buy a cuddly toy version of: The Common Cold, The Flu, Sore Throat, Stomach Ache, Cough, Ear Ache, Bad Breath, Kissing Disease, Athlete’s Foot, Ulcer, Martian Life, Beer & Bread, Black Death, Ebola, Flesh Eating, Sleeping Sickness, Dust Mite, Bed Bug, and Bookworm (and in our Professional line: H.I.V. and Hepatitis). Who wouldn't want the whole darn collection.

People might actually think you are sick in the head, though.

Liverpool Watch: 8-0

Now that's a pretty scoreboard. A record score in a European competition (take that Arsenal) plus Liverpool's 500th goal in Europe. Here are the ITV highlights:

Remember, remember the 5th of November...

...The gun powder treason and plot,
I know of no reason the gunpowder treason
Should ever be forgot
Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes, 'twas his intent
To blow up the king and parliment
Three scores barrels were laid below
To prove old england's overthrow
By God's mercy he was catched
By a dimmed lantern and a burning match
Holler boys, holler boys, let the bells ring
Holler boys, holler boys, God save the king

It wasn't the best movie in the world (The Pink Panther was more popular at the time) but I watched V For Vendetta on DVD for the first time since it came out in the cinema a year and a half ago because it's, you know, that day.

I know that Alan Moore doesn't approve of it but I thought it was okay... ish? The comic wasn't that much more impressive to me either, despite being an Alan Moore fan. Find out for yourself here. Here are some scenes from the Watchowski Brothers(?) -produced movie:

V takes over a news station:


V makes himself known to Natalie Portman:


That is by far the most annoying speech of any kind, made anywhere, ever. Here it is in all it's vile (oh-ho!) intirity:

"Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of Fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is it vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished."

It's at this point Natalie Portman's character looks at him like "Shut the fuck up already and shave my head, will you."

Yet he continues "However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified..."and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous.

Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose so let me simply add that it's my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V."

I don't really understand much of that speech, but I do know this: Natalie Portman is hawt.